Call it like I see it

Something more important than the upcoming holidays has happened that is leaving every Facebook status filled and every Mobile Upload full of hearts and exclamation points that needs to be addressed: author Stephanie Meyer's (almost) final installment of the Twilight series has been produced into the film: Breaking Dawn: Part One.

After having read each of the books cover to cover, in a somewhat timely fashion, I can't help but grind my teeth as each book is produced into a movie. Although a number of people have already addressed their loyalty or hatred toward the series as a whole,  I'm somewhat skeptical. While the series has been discussed to death, and all opinions are our there, I still have a hard time understanding what all the fuss is about. 

I will admit, I enjoyed reading the series—it provided an interesting perspective and concept I'm not a self-proclaimed expert in, so reading about vampires and werewolves was entertaining enough to have me sit down for the entirety of last winter's break and read each book cover to cover. 

After my grandmother recognized the reading binge an English major goes through during months away from mandatory-course-selected reading, she decided to pick up another Meyer book for me called The Host. From the sound of the title, I was hesitant to pick it up and dive right in. I had about four days left of break and I was still debating between reading straight through the 96 hours left or sleeping, because the next semester was coming up and I knew sleep would be a rarity. 

Needless to say, I found myself sitting on the same bathroom floor, under the same bright lights reading until I packed up the Corolla and headed back to the lovely 508.

Over the course of the year, as discussion of the Twilight series faded, I began to think about the possibility of The Host hitting the big screen. I've already been disappointed before when certain books (Artemis Fowl) didn't receive an opportunity to be produced into a motion picture. But once again, Twilight is here, rearing its (ugly) head for those who want to follow along.

Discussions within the Provoc office have led me to be sarcastic and bitter toward the series' plotline and message sent to its audience, even though I enjoyed reading the books. While the series provides a relatively Christian-based point of view of relationships (hear me out on this one), the independent women of the office seem to be less than offended by the plotline and message that the series provides.

To elaborate on my point that the Twilight series has a fundamental likeness to Christian teaching is that it stresses that sex before marriage should be avoided. But what bothers critical readers of the text, myself included, is the portrayal that women have throughout the series, most specifically the protagonist, Bella.

Bella wants a boy. Bella finds mysterious boy. Every girl wants said mysterious boy. Mysterious boy goes missing just long enough for the audience to expect that he'll come back sooner rather than later (it's only been about twenty minutes into the film, there's no way it's over now; I paid for a full hour and a half film and I don't want to go through the hassle of arguing with a movie theater employee over the nine bucks I spent to watch the movie). Boy returns. Boy does something to show that he notices girl. Girl is flustered. Boy confesses that he has always loved girl. Girl is giddy. BOOM. RIGHT THERE—problem number one. "Boy confesses that he has always loved girl." 

Anyone remember that high school fling—that first encounter with love in the early teenage years? Well, here you go. While we'd like to think that love works this way, the older generation just laughs and smiles at our naïveté and lets us keep believing we'll marry our first boyfriend/girlfriend. 

Let me continue. Boy tells girl deep, dark secret about himself. Girl accepts, because girl is so happy that boy notices her. Other boy is introduced. Other boy is more fun, more affable. Girl begins to spend more time with second boy. Father likes second boy more than first boy. Girl gets mad at father for "not understanding love"—why would he, the said father and unmentioned mother are divorced, how could he possibly know what love is… Girl stops hanging out with second boy but first boy gets angry, throws a minor temper tantrum and leaves girl. Girl reacts in a negative way toward personal health. Problem two. "Girl reacts in a negative way toward personal health." In essence, she wanders into the woods and practically loses her mind.