Letter to the Editor: Professor responds to Brennan censure

I was a bit surprised to read in the latest edition of the Provoc, which is short for Le Provocateur, that Matthew Brennan had been censured by the SGA for failing to, or rather, refusing to attend what is called in these parts "Leadership Training." Apparently, at a college with a newspaper entitled Le Provocateur, Matthew's refusal was too provocative for the BOBs [Basic Old Bureaucrats] that control student affairs or whatever it is called these days. And, of course I thought almost immediately that an ability to provoke is probably among the least desirable characteristics that leaders, that is, that trained leaders should possess. As I recalled some of the leaders who have stood out for me, I realized that none of them were provocative. Martin Luther King, Jr.? Malcolm X? Ronald Reagan? George W. Bush [Shrub]? Franklin Roosevelt? Teddy Roosevelt? Woodrow Wilson? Abraham Lincoln? Andrew Jackson? Tommy Jefferson [I always called him "Tommy" in Virginia when I taught there.]? The men who led the American Revolution? I don't really know what Mr. Brennan was thinking when he decided to be so provocative as to warrant censure by or at the behest of the BOBs. Shame on you, Matthew Brennan! Have you learned nothing in my classes about obedience, especially to bureaucrats? Apparently not! To repeat what you obviously missed in class: Obedience is next to godliness.

But then I began to think: These BOBs must have great wisdom, even wisdom that can be passed on to others, if they really can train leaders. I mean some of them are parents so perhaps they have learned to train leaders from training their toddlers to pee in the toilet. No doubt some of them are pet owners so perhaps they learned to train leaders from training their pets, that is, "housebreaking" them. I don't think any of them ever worked in a circus so I doubt very much whether they learned to train leaders from training the Big Cats we can see when the circus comes to town. Of course, perhaps though, the metaphor "a circus" might be used to describe how these BOBs view student life at Assumption College. But I really doubt it, as they are far too serious and too enlightened to hold anything but the most respectful attitudes toward those they are training.

But I am compelled to wonder: If the BOBs here really know how to train leaders, real leaders, genuine leaders, why are they using these talents here? I mean, there is nothing wrong here-oh no, for as I read in the Provoc piece, everyone is happy with the outcome visited upon that reprobate Brennan - but I mean shouldn't these BOBs take these talents to Washington, D.C. and train our politicians how to be leaders? Perhaps they could even go to the White House and help Barack Obama. After all, he seems to need help.

I don't have time though to consider this possibility at length as I have try to figure out a way to get through to Mr. Brennan to teach him, or rather to train him, in how he ought to live his life as prescribed by the BOBs, both those here and those he will meet once he graduates! Oh, I know! I will have him read JFK's great inaugural in which he said " "Ask not what your country can do for you. Ask what you can do for your country!" That should do it! And maybe Mr. Brennan can find a contemporary version of the Vietnam War and go off to fight it, as so many young men did in the 60's. Gee, there must be a war around somewhere he could fight. Let me think, let me think.